Edge of Insanity
by Maybe Tomorrow Maybe Today
Summary: Ginnys heart is shattered, even the bottle of fire whiskey in front of her doesn't help. Will harry ever admit that he still loves her or will his 'heroic' deed rip them apart. sorry I'm horrid at writing summaries RWHrG GWHP
1. The Pain Begins

Disclaimer: I do not own Harry potter or the other characters in the Harry potter series yada yada yada.

This takes place right after Harry leaves Ginny…..

_**The Pain Begins**_

Harry walked way from her to quickly; you see he didn't hear her heart breaking. As it shattered and fell into her stomach she could barely hold back the tears. Her red hair was swept away in the breeze that followed. In almost a whisper her response was only heard by the wind "I love you to" Harry had left her all alone there by the lake and there was only one thing she could do. It seemed everyone else was morning the death of Albums Dumbledore the wizard who was wiser than any could imagine. Now he was gone along with a part of Ginny. Looking over the lake all she wanted to do was shatter along with her heart. That lake had given her a sanctuary before, and now more than ever its chilled waters were calling her. She stood there on the bank of the black lake and let herself fall.

She let the cold water wash over her, cleansing her and allowing her to let her tears fall. She burst to the surface but only to take in a gulp of air and dive again. This dive she went down about 4 feet so the light was just barely visible. Then all the memories came again, their first kiss, the first date, the first time she knew Harry was the one. With that she let out what would have been a scream if she had not been submerged in the black lake. All that came was a stream of bubbles.

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When the owl post arrived two mornings later there were shocked gasps and long glances at Harry before he had even had some toast. Ron had just come down a moment before Harry and knew this was NOT going to be a good day. Ron and Hermione had tried to keep Harry and Ginny's breaking up quite, fat chance! It was also obvious as to why Ginny Weasley had not come down for breakfast. The front page of the prophet said it all.

_**A Broken Heart**_

_**He Dumped Her!**_

_Hello my Rabid Readers! It has come to my attention that Teen Witch's number one bachelor is back. The hunky Harry Potter has broken up with his semi-long term girlfriend Ginny Weasley. "It was quite tragic really." State one of Miss. Weaslys close friends, Pansy Parkinson. "You could here her crying outside the abandoned girls' lavatory. Poor thing."_

The picture was the worst of all tortures for Harry. A bright pink heart surrounded a very bad picture of Harry. "Not the best picture is it Potter." This was not what Harry needed at all. Millicent Bulstrode

Did not tend to bring out the best in people (especially since Malfoy left), and Harry was no exception. 'Damn it. If I can manage to hold Harry back from hitting that prat it will be a god send!' "Well I personally think you did the world a favor. I mean could you just imagine the kids!" Pansy Parkinson Burst into a fit of giggles at this and almost fell of the bench she was sitting on. Ron Saw Hermione swiftly take her wand out to make sure that they paid.

Ron turned his head to see what all the commotion was about to find the best laid prank he had ever seen from Hermione. As Pansy started to sit up again she suddenly found herself falling again and grabbing for support she found Millicents' robes and the table cloth. Not a moment later Millicent was dead center over Pansy and a bowl of what looked like spoiled porridge and jelly fell all over them. "WHAT IS THIS!" Millicent was simple appalled by the idea of smelling badly.

"I DON'T CARE WHAT IT IS JUST GAT OFF ME!" Pansy yelled interrupting his ranting. This put the hole hall (with the exception of Snape and most Slytherins), all of them forgetting what they had just read in the Prophet. Well all but Harry, he was too confused to talk or laugh for that mater.

_LATER THAT DAY….._

Ron ran after Hermione after transfiguration. "Hermione that was bloody BRILIENT! It definitely got people minds off the prophet."

"Thanks Ron. Couldn't help myself her face was priceless, not to say that yours wasn't ether." She looked as though she was suppressing a fit of giggles. Ron couldn't tell if that was a complement or not. He had never been all that good at translating the female language. "Hey where's Harry? He's supposed to go study with us after lunch. We needed to find more advanced spell books."

"He wasn't feeling so hot so he's gone for a walk."

"Oh. Well you want to get a head start I'm not hungry"

"Sure, I don't think I cold stand another fit of laughing like that." And with that they walk down the hall and towards the library.

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Harry sat on top of the roof just outside the west tower window. He was trying to get his sprits up before the farewell feast the next night. It seemed a pointless task, even flying didn't help. He had been attempting to get out of this state for some time now but again it was hopeless. He missed her plain and simply, more than that he felt as though he had a hole in his heart. He loved her to much to have her and it was killing him. He had landed on the roof of this tower hoping the cool night would bring him piece of mind. He was looking at the grounds when he saw something that (if it was possible at this point) made him even more wary. Someone was walking, almost running across the grounds, flaming red hair flying behind them.

He suppressed his emotions and flew back to Gryffindor tower flying faster than he ever knew he could fly. He threw open the windows to find the boys dorm empty. Grabbing his invisibility cloak he began to sprint to where he had seen Ginny. 'It's not safe. Voldemort's out there and I can't let him hurt Ginny.' Harris mind was racing at the thought of Voldemort having her, but he pushed these thoughts away he only had one thing he had to do.

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Ginny went out late one night; she had a bottle of fire whisky and needed to clear her head. 'I need to forget. This is getting pitiful!' she collapsed before of a tree and began to forget.

A bottle of liquor later…

She was about 6 sheets to the wind when Harry finally found her dot on the map and made it to her. "Hey Ginny." he tried to wake her up but couldn't, his pulse was raised he took half a step back and almost fell over an empty bottle of what smelled like fire whisky. "Oh no babe, what did you do." in his mind Harry answered his own question. 'She's hurting as much as I am' he remembered just two nights ago when Ron had to levitate Harry back to bed. Harry fond that 'forgetting' was a hard thing to do. "He had downed a third of a bottle and fallen into a state very similar to Ginnys. "Come on we'll just get you to bed."

Her eyes gently lifted as Harry lifted her onto his broom. "I-I l-l-lo" the partial words she spoke were slurred and oddly familiar to his heart.

"It's ok. Shh, we better get you to the girls dorm it'd almost mornig." And with that Ginny collapsed again, knowing that she was safe.

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Come on tell me what you think of my first fan-fic! Please coment!

ME


	2. Lets Hope This Was All A Dream

-1Lets Hope This Was All A Dream

Ginny had been lying awake that fateful Saturday morning for what seemed like and eternity. The headache began to fade and what she hoped was a horrible nightmare started to come back to her. 'What the bloody hell was I thinking! I know I miss him but why not chocolate that ALWAYS makes me feel better why did I have to steal Hennas hidden stash WHY' turning over for the 30th time she felt the hence coming back with vengeance. 'Because I'M A STUPID GIT THAT'S WHY' She had been going over what she could remember of the nights events in her head. Sadly what she could remember wasn't good.

She remembered the lake, and the feeling of almost forgetting her troubles only to have them hit her in the face again. She also could remember. No it couldn't, be she had dreamt she was flying with Harry. He had held her close; she could remember the last thing he said to her before putting her in her bed. "Forgetting can sure be a pain in the arse"

Ginny got lost in those words for almost five minuets before the door slammed open. Hermione cam barging in, quickly followed by a levitating Ron, who had the most confused and terror ridden face Ginny had ever seen. "WHERE THE BLOOD GOOD DAMN HELL WERE YOU? ME AND RON HAVE BEEN UP ALL NIGHT. YOU SCARED US TO DEATH. IF YO EVER GO DOING SOMETHING AS F-ING STUPID AS LEAVING THE CASTLE AT NIGHT WITH VOLDEMORT BACK AGAIN I WILL RING YOUR F-ING NEACK" It took Ginny a moment to process all the thoughts that came bursting in her head. First of all Ron was levitating, second Hermione just swore and it was all Ginny could do from not falling out of her bed laughing.

Ron looked more shocked than ever, "'mione-" and in an atemt to calm Hermione down he tried reasoning "maybe we should sit an-"

"RON SHUT UP OR I'LL- I'LL"

"Hermione, Yelling is NOT good for hangovers." Ginny grabbed her head trying to keep her brain from popping out. Just then Rons eyes pooped out of his head. Hermione shut up (briefly) but kept the look that Ginny was used to see when Ron had done something horrid to her. Ginny almost fell out of bed when she tried to get up as she made what Ron and Hermione assumed was a b-line for the door. It is safe to say Ginny and Harry would not make it to the door.

"YOU WHAT!" Shouted Hermione and Ron together, Harry who had been flying up to the girls' dorm stoped dead if Hermione and Ron were in there yelling at her this would not be the time to visit. Harry then realized that if he wanted to get out of the corridor he would have to go to the top of the stairs and turn around. Harry cried the size of the hall ad as quietly as he could proceed to the nearest landing, the landing that lead straight to were Ginnys was now clambering towards.

"WERE IN THE BLODDY HELL DID YOU GAT FIREWISKY!" Ron was no longer scared of Hermione but joined her in an effort to ring Ginny dry of information. "DO YOU EVEN RELIZE HO SCARED WE WERE ABOUT YOU? YOU WERE GONE ALL BLOODY NIGHT."

"How much of that stuff did you have? 'Cause if went gallivanting around the place doing god knows what I don't know what I'll do."

This was all to much for Ginny she got up as best as she could and stumbled to the door, nausea and drowsiness getting the best of her. "Where do you think your going? YOU HAVE A HANGOVER"

"YES RONALD I BLOODY WELL KNOW I HAVE A HANG OVER AND YES IT'S BECAUSE I MISS HARRY, AND NO I WILL NOT TELL YOU WHAT I DID. ALL I WANT FROM YOU TWO RIGHT NOW IS SOME PRIVACY." Ginnys words were followed by a slam of her dormitory door. Leaving Hermione awestruck and Ron still floating in mid air. She made her way gingerly down the stairs.

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Harry had just made it half way down the stairs when he heard Ginny getting the last word in on their argument. 'That's my Ginny always gets them in the end.' Harry swore under his breath, all of this, the fights the pain all to stop an evil son of a bitch who had no since of life, or death for that matter. Voldemort would never be truly alive but he just wouldn't DIE.

Harrys rant was stopped quickly when he heard something that nearly made his heart stop. He turned around hoping it was an elution but he only had time to react. Ginny was falling down the stairs, he reached out his arms to catch her but lost his balance. They fell down the stairs together Harry holding his love head close as the tears welled in her eyes.

"What th- Ginny! Harry!" Fred rounded the corner to find to unconscious bodies before him, his sister and his friend. "George GET MADOM POMFRY NOW!" He ran over to them Ginnys arm was swollen and looked broken. Fred moved her slowly from Harrys grip, setting her next to him. Harrys eye fluttered open he reached out his hand holding Ginnys good arm before slipping blacking out again. "God damn it where's George."


	3. Now or Never

-1**Thanks for the reviews.**

PS (_'means someone is thinking' **-means the little voice in the back of his/her head-**_

Now or Never

Ginny was running through the darkest mist, the forest around her was all but gone. Even though Ginnys heart started to pound it was so peaceful. Better than the emptiness she had been felling. Lost in her thoughts she almost didn't hear the twig break behind her. She turned her head just enough to see the black robe and white mask, she ran ahead faster than she ever knew was possible. The fog began to clear and she heard a voice she recognized ahead. "HARRY" She ran faster and faster until she reached a clearing.

Harry was lying in the middle of the clear. Ginny heard her pursuer getting closer and closer. She rushed to Harry, "Harry, HARRY. Wake up we have to get out of here." Just then Ginny saw the silver fog return. Ginny held Harry close and let the fog hide them.

"Now Ginny this is no fun. Come out come out were ever you are." That voice slick, and almost calm. "I have killed before…this will be no different, I'm so sad to see that you will not come quietly. Oh well more fun for me" Lilly cleared her thought; she imagined the complete nothings she now knew to well. "MISS. WEASLY, YOU WOULD MAKE THIS A LOT EASYER IF YOU CAME OUT."

Lilly shoot up out of her resting place, in a cold sweat. She was in the hospital wing. The stark white curtains around her brought the whole memory back. 'Not again!' She had been having that same dream for a month now, but this was different. This was too real. A migraine built up in her head as she rested again.

"Gin'" She turned over to see the deepest green emerald eyes.

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"Gin', you had a nightmare." Harry saw her eyes and his heart skipped a beat. She'd been out of it for three hours. 'I've missed those eyes. "There's a little blue in her eyes if you look REALY hard"

"Harry are you ok?"

"I should be asking you that" _'why did I say that out load!'_

_**-Because it's true-**_

'_Even if it was there's no point.'_

_**-do I have to spell it out for you again...-**_

'_Well why don't yo...'_

"What happened? All I remember is Hermione yelling at me and I went to leave." Ginny was talking at a whisper, like if she spoke any loader she wouldn't be able to say I at all. "An…and I fell."

"Well from what Fred tells me you landed on top of me and we both kind-off got knocked out."

"Mr. Potter if you would so kindly remove your self for a moment, I have to tend to Miss. Weasleys arm." Madam Pomfrey had crept up behind them.

"I'll be back." I went to leave but an arm came and pulled me back.

"Miss. Weasleys, you will make this a lot easier if you allow him t-"

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I had never wanted something so much before that moment. It felt like if Harry left I may never see him again. I don't know what possessed me to grab his arm but when we touched it sent shivers through my arm. It just felt right. "Please, I…I just need…a friend right now." _'So I won't feel so alone.'_

I had been having odd conversations with myself ever since my little…dip in the lake shall we say. It was very odd like I was trying to convince myself of something.

_**-that hole's not going to fill itself you know.-**_

'_Not now you! Be quite for a minuet will you.'_

_**-Fine but if you ask m…-**_ Thank god that little arse was cut short by Madam Pomfreys glare.

"Alright, though I doubt it will help anything." She then scurried off to her office and retrieved one of her less repulsive potions. Even if it did look somewhat like the slime in the girls bathroom on the 3rd floor. "Drink this and get some rest, BOTH of you. Mr. Potter I know you would like to stay but I must insist you leave before breakfast. I need some sleep to." With that she disappeared into her office once again.

We sat there in silence for what seemed to be an hour till I spoke up. "I miss you." I was trying (and failing) to keep my voice from creaking.

"I miss you to." Harrys eyes no longer had the spark of courage and mischief I so adored. Now they held something that I had been trying (and failing yet again) to do, hide the pain. "You better drink that"

"Do I really have to?"

"Yes, sadly you do."

So that's what I did, downing that was a lot worse than ANY amount of a hangover though. After a long silence I finally spoke my mind. "Harry, you're not helping me by doing this you know." I had my eyes fixed on the floor. 'And that's were they're staying!' Looking bake at those eyes would make it to hard not to cry.

"What are you -?"

"Harry, right now I need to tell you something. If you stop me again I don't think it will ever come out. I need to tell you that…that I love you. Look even if I didn't do you REALY think I'd be any safer. My family is like YOUR family and if that doesn't put all of us at the TOP of v-voldimorts list that I don't know what does. You said you did it for us but even I can see the red lines in your eyes." It was getting harder and harder for me to hold back the tears. It also wasn't helping that I had a certain voice in the back of my head. You know you want to. Just kiss him already, it's not like he's not thinking the same thing. 'Note to self kill that damn voice.' "You breath smells like you've been sneaking into the boars head more than I have!" With that Harrys checks grew a darker shade of red. "Your trying to be s night in shining armor, you've been like that forever, but Harry not all of your decisions are right. I love you, I don't know how or when and frankly I don't give a rats arse." I couldn't do it any more I brought him into the tightest hug ever given.

We stated there for at least 20 minuets. Just holding each other, hoping we could be here forever.

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Ginny feel asleep in my arms. I placed once again on the sheets. I kissed her forehead and whispered the words that my hearts knew were true. "I love you to." With that I left the hospital wing to find Ron and Hermione. Considering it was 5 am there was very little foot traffic.

'_I shouldn't have done that.'_

_**-yes you should have and you did so there! I win yet again I might add!-**_

'_Note to self KILL BLASTED VOICE IN HEAD'_

_**-now you wouldn't do that now would you Harry…-**_

_**-..Harry….Harry?…ohm did I strike a nerve..-**_

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When I woke up my arm was no longer broken and I was released from the hospital wing by lunch. I didn't want to face anyone so I just let my feet do the walking. I soon found myself by the lake again. _'At least I can arrange my thoughts here'_

_**-Don't you mean WE-**_

'_Not you again. I was hoping you'd left for good after…'_

_**-last night NO. Even after a bottle of fire whiskey I'm not leaving.-**_

'_Why the BLOODY HELL NOT'_

_**-Well that's easy. I'm here to stay. Muhahahahaha!-**_

'_Just great now I have little voices in the back of my head! Who might I add has the WORST evil laugh I have ever heard..'_

_**-Oh go jump in the lake!-**_

'_FINE I WILL'_

_**-OK OK I'll shut up so you can order you damn thoughts. Boy we are testy today...-**_

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**YEA new chapter! Pleas R&R. thank you to all my readers! Hope you like it!**

TIA


	4. All The Bloody Drama

-1**Thanks for the reviews.**

Hey people thanks soooo much for reviews, thanx at bottom!

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_**--Ron POV--**_

"'MIONE!" Wait a sec. _'WOMAN! I swear…' _ "Will you please slow down, it's just a broken arm. Enough of the drama." Hermione hand stormed out pf the hospital wing corridor after talking to madam Pomfrey (sp…) and being shoed out. She was obviously pissed off. She had made it down to the lake before Ron caught up to her. Lavender and him hadn't been together in a week but Hermione still wasn't that happy with Ron. "Stop play bloody tonsil hokey for a minute and help me and Harry!" no she was NOT happy…

"Ron that's not why I'm mad OK." She turned to face him and sighed. "Ron, every thing is going to change now. Ginny's knows about our plans for the summer, she's not dumb. Even if she doesn't know precisely what we're doing, she knows something is up." She looked Ron in the eyes knowingly.

"You know she won't let us NOT take her. I don't want her getting hurt but…Do not try and stop her Ronald, (Ron closed his mouth) she loves you but…she will kick your arse if you keep her in the dark about this much more."

"I know Hermione…a lot of things are changing." Ron said leaning against a nearby tree. "People I know, people I've talked to are dieing every day. Just look what happened to Maloney the 5th year's parents. They died 2 days ago."

"I hate to admit it but your right." Said Hermione as she sat under the tree and leaned against it. "I guess I just. Just can't imagine losing you all. Molly, Author, Fred & George, Ginny, Neville, the teachers, Luna, Harry…but" She sighed. "I just don't know what I'd do with out you." Ron now sat down next to her, looking into her deep brown eyes, and her into his glassy sapphire ones.

He leaned a little closer to her, "I don't know what I'd do with out you either Hermione"

He put his hand on her chin gently lowering his head to hers. Letting his heart control what he did instead of his pride. Their lips gently touched. Not worrying about consequences Hermione put her arms around his neck and depend the kiss. Their hearts pounding in time together.

Ron broke of eyes shimmering with hope and love, "'Mione, you're a much better kisser than Lavander will ever be." She play punched his arm, "OWWW. That hurt…". He put his arm around her waist.

"Oh stop being a pansy, Ginny's right you know. We have to live for today, 'cause we may not…you know."

"We may not have tomorrow. Yeah I've been thinking about that a lot lately. So, what should we do now? Find Harry and force him to stop being a bloody git, or snog? OWW." again Hermione hit him, a bit harder this time.

She looked up to him a grin across her face. "Both…"

HARRYS POV

Harry had no reason to go to breakfast or lunch; instead he got a pass from Professor McGonagal to look through the restricted section. He was gathering all the books he could find on Dark arts and how to protect yourself. He had a tower of books and was carrying them over to an empty table when he lost his balance.

He fell backward landing on the hard stone below. Every thing went dark when he woke up Ginny was tapping his face. "Harry, Harry. God Damn it wake up. Oh Harry finally, I came here looking for you."

Not thinking he brushed his hand over her face. "Ginny you shouldn't be here. It's n-"

"Don't you dare try to pull that crap on me! I love you, end of story…Damn your stubborn" Harry sighed. And stood up.

"I'm not stubborn I just want the-"

"Harry James Potter do not go all heroic on me again, it's unbearable." Ginny waved her wand and all the books on the floor formed too much neater and shorter stacks. "Harry also I'm not stupid…I know your not coming next year even if the school did re-open. I'm coming, I'm helping…"

"No you-" Ginny sent Harry her death glare and Harry knew she was not kidding, and unless he wanted to die before Voldemort got to him he would keep arguing with her. "Fine BUT on one condition."

"and what would that be?" she locked up at him.


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